Goodbye, World!

The mid-life crisis

It was the first day of Spring. After a tough and solid winter, it was finally good to be out. They say nothing is as beautiful as Spring, but looking at Stella’s face, Maja couldn’t give another thought about the weather, or the rather quaint café they were sitting at.

They were lucky enough to get a seat outside in the rush hour, thanks to Maja’s sister who worked at the café as a waitress part-time. Brushing her mostly blonde hair aside, Maja took a sip of her favorite Kaffeost which she had to custom order as it wasn’t on the regular menu at the café, again thanks to her suddenly influential sister.

Maja is that kind of person with a unique style and taste in everything that she does. That’s one of the reasons why she was wearing steel blue blazers and black trousers to a post-work Monday date. Meanwhile, Stella ordered a Cappuccino, the first thing from the menu, which was going cold as she sat cross legged in her casual sweater dress, knitted and loose. It was also the first thing that she found on the store, with red and pink striped pattern. It wasn’t because she was lazy, but because she actually liked them. Talk about basic going out of fashion.

“A beautiful day today,” said Maja sticking her sunglasses over her unbelievably straight and well-kept hair, and her cellphone on the table.

Her voice was quite muffled over all the hustle and bustle of the busy café, which was a bit too crowded for a Monday with couples and families chattering and about whose weekend was better or whose issues were bigger. But it couldn’t have been too muffled to not have reached Stella, who kept staring between the two pillars of wall beside their table and didn’t say anything for a while.

She was looking at the kids playing catch with each other as she suddenly turned to Maja, as if a robot were switched on, and said, “I was thinking, a little house on a hilltop, couple of kids we can name Mikael and Zoya, and maybe a Labrador Retriever, Carina, as we watch them grow old together. Do you think about such things? About us?”

Maja was taken aback a bit with what Stella had asked out of the blue. Anytime the thought occured about their future, Maja had always pushed it out of her mind and got distracted with something else, mostly with work. But deep inside, she was afraid to confront herself with the question for some time now.

“Yes! You know I want the same, I want to do all of that with you,” said Maja as she paused for a second.

“But?” said Stella as she looked askance, although she believed deep within that Maja also wanted the same for them.

“You know, Stella, I feel like a nomad. I’m not sure if this would make sense to you, but I feel like I don’t belong here, in this city, in this place. I feel like I’m always going to end up somewhere else,” said Maja and before she could finish the thought, Stella helped the conversation move along faster.

“Do you see us together in that life? Wherever it takes you or me,” asked Stella.

Maja knew she couldn’t answer that question, at least not at that moment. But she knew she loved Stella, more than anyone else in her life. Stella was the one who introduced her to Rock music, she was the one who showed her first kisses can be awkward and still feel so right, she was the one who showed her that you can actually spend the whole night in bed just talking and still end up sleeping satisfied, she was the one who wanted her to pursue a career in engineering, she even got her the current job where they worked together. Maja tightened her grip on Stella’s hand and pulled herself closer towards her and planted a kiss on her coffee coated lips. As she pulled away, she knew she had to find the answer, Stella deserved that, but she spoke nothing at that moment.

The Memory Congress

“Dr. Bergen, you can speak now,” said a councilman at the United Nations Commission on Science and Technology for Development (CSTD), nudging a young lady in her late twenties that it’s her turn now to address the meeting.

“Thank you, Dr. Hales”, started Alex. “We all know why we have gathered here. It’s about the alarming rise in the usage of Intelligent Artificial Memory Recall, or, as we call it, IAMR. Two decades ago, when the technology was introduced to us, even the brightest minds on Earth back then felt it was revolutionary and something all of us marveled at. It was possible by recording all the sensory data from our brain’s visual cortex, auditory cortex, somatosensory cortex, etc. live on the wire and artificially glue them together to present a relivable experience whenever and wherever we wanted to. In fact, now parents can opt to install the memory transmitting chip in their children even before they take their first breath. Sounds almost surreal even talking about it now.

People started realizing that by outsourcing our memories through smartphones and cameras, we tend to miss living in that moment. When recalling and reliving memory was an option, it piqued everyone’s interests. Big names in the corporate world swooped in to produce their own implementation and saw it as another easy way to create revenue. Who would want to buy cameras when they can relive their memories and feel whatever they felt at that moment, right? While one-third of world’s human population were living in near un-livable conditions with increased temperatures and drought due to global warming, a new revenue stream is what we all needed.

Although there was initial skepticism on the potential long-term effects of the technology on the human body, the mental impact was somehow sidelined. My organization and I have been trying to raise this emergency alarm for the past 5 years, with many unsuccessful attempts. Either we’re silenced and threatened by those corporations or the governments who, at this point have no say in running their own countries. It is also a human rights concern, where governments and global organizations use the technology to invade into people’s private lives without their permission, but it’s a whole another topic that I’ve presented multiple times in the same hall.

Already, we’re progressing with the technology at a rapid pace that the new and improved transmitter chips collect memories that happened even before they were installed by accessing medial temporal lobe of human brain. Due to the continually increased usage of IAMR, we see people losing their lives every day. For some, it’s about a long-lost love, for some, it’s about a lifetime achievement, for some others, it’s the most regretted moments of their lives. From children to elders, most of us are obsessed over our past that we forget to see what’s right in front of us and what’s going to be in the future. It’s ridiculous how we, as human race, have decided to see right past all our socioeconomical and geographical issues while the world is in turmoil and decided to live in the past.

Have we given up on our future generations? Or do we just don’t care about what lives or dies on Earth once our time is over? In another 10,000 years, it’s predicted that 95% of human population would possibly become extinct. It may seem like a lot of time but it’s only 10,000 years ago that humans invented agriculture and colonized nearly all ice-free parts of the globe.

To secure the future and to make sure that we set sail in the right direction, we believe that the governments should take the responsibilities to regulate artificial memory recall and any technology that poses a threat to the survival of our civilization and its well-being. We have raised a motion for it with all the supporting documents and our proposal already to the court.”

As the discussion ended, Alex was walking back to her car when she was stopped by a man wearing a gray plaid suit and matching hat.

“That was a good speech, Alex. Had me almost emotional,” said the man, in a belittling tone.

“I don’t have time for this, Dr. Anders,” said Alex as she started walking past him. “You mentioned a lot of bad things about IAMR in the meeting, do you know where else it’s being used? In our prisons, for life-time sentenced prisoners where they relive their worst and most regretted memories again and again until they eventually give up and die in agony. I’d be careful if I were you,” he said as he walked back into the meeting hall.

The beginning of the end

Maja returned home to a pleasant surprise that evening. The house was dim lit with yellow lights wherever she could see, be it electric lamps or scented candles. It smelled like a night in the beach, salty and earthy, but the sweet smell of lavender and rose cut through it like dessert in the middle of a spicy Sichuan food.

Although she immediately knew what it was all about, she didn’t expect it, given Stella was at the peak of her laziness stint that month.

“Oops, why are you home so early?” exclaimed Stella still wearing her dirty apron with smears of the lingonberry sauce that she ‘carefully’ poured into the bowl.

“Well, I thought I’d surprise you, but clearly I’m the one who’s surprised,” said Maja as she kept the Taittinger Brut Réserve bottle on the table rather carelessly and walked towards Stella.

“Wait, I’m not even ready yet,” said Stella as she pulled away from Maja, feeling a bit underprepared for the moment.

Without saying a word, Maja pulled Stella towards her, undid her apron at the back as it dropped down and moved her lips as close as possible to hers, “Now you are ready.”

Stella couldn’t wait for another moment as she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, reached out and found her lips against Maja’s for a long and deep kiss that just said thousands of words that she otherwise wouldn’t have.

“Happy third anniversary, my love,” said Maja as she popped open the bottle of Stella’s favorite champagne.

“Don’t sink it, like you did the last time,” warned Stella playfully.

Once Stella got the opportunity to finish her mashed potatoes and meatballs, they sat down for dinner in their perfectly lit balcony. The breeze was dreamy and the world outside was too silent that they could hear some drunk college students singing and passing time down by the lake nearby.

“Don’t tell me ‘you’ made this sauce,” said Maja, loving every taste of it.

“Yes, I’ve picked up some skills lately. I should make some more next time,” said Stella.

“I think there’s a whole another batch on your apron,” said Maja jokingly.

As Stella served Maja’s favorite dessert Smulpaj, a fruit crumble, she felt it was the perfect set up to pop the question, something she has been thinking of late and hoped that they both are ready for.

“Maja, I know bring it up a lot. We’ve been together for 3 years now, and we both are in a good position in our lives, careers, that I feel we are missing that one thing. I want us to move from being a couple to a family,” said Stella.

Maja dropped the spoon back on her dessert and wiped the sugary crumble that rested on her mouth. “I know, I’ve been thinking about it too,” said Maja. “I admit that I wasn’t the person who wanted a family together or settle down, I liked living life in the fast lane. At one point, I gave up on me, on us. But you held on. You gave me the time, you showed me there is so much to life than success, fame, or money. It’s all because of you, I think I’m ready for it too and wouldn’t want to do it with anyone else.”

Stella couldn’t contain her happiness within herself. She felt like she wanted to jump out on the street, run towards the lake and sing her heart out like the rest of the college students there. But she noticed that Maja was wiping her mouth again, but this time, it wasn’t the remnants of the dessert, but something redder.

Suddenly, the napkin was wet and turned red. Maja had coughed up some blood from her mouth and was struggling to catch her breath. Stella couldn’t fathom what was happening in front of her. The mood went from blooming flowers to rotting corpses within a minute. She jumped across the table to catch a falling Maja as the champagne bottle hit the floor and smashed into pieces.

“Maja, are you okay? What’s happening?” she asked nervously, for which Maja couldn’t answer. She simply looked into the eyes of Stella as if she just witnessed afterlife.

As Maja gasped and went unconscious, Stella grabbed her phone with blood on her hands and struggled to dial 911.

The Sweet Haven

“Mrs. Bergen,” called out the caretaker in the senior living home Sweet Haven, wanting to see if the elderly woman who was in her late 70s would want to join her in the Garden Club.

“Mrs. Bergen,” she called out once again hopefully. But the lady near the window never even blinked. It was as if she was tranced. “You don’t have to come to the Garden Club, but would you please eat your breakfast?”

She gave no reaction. The young lady left the room with a slight hint of disappointment but also felt sad for Mrs. Bergen. She took residence in Sweet Haven to be monitored and kept away from her addiction.

“Hey Jenny, did you get Mrs. Bergen?” asked one of her fellow caretakers in the garden club.

“No, it’s as usual, she wouldn’t respond,” said Jenny.

“Alright, let’s continue without her. Why is she in here anyway?” asked the new lady from the garden club.

“She was addicted to the memory recall program, started having sudden seizures often due to it and her granddaughter dropped her in last year since she couldn’t take care of her anymore,” said Jenny.

“That thing is real, I tell you. I have an Uncle who is on it non-stop. He hasn’t had any physical issues, however, sometimes we feel he’s gone mental,” said the lady.

Jenny was worried about Mrs. Bergen, although the seizures have reduced, it seemed as if she’s lost the will to live. She didn’t respond to anyone visiting her, and even stopped attending her favorite bible reading sessions.

The Truth and The Lies

“I know it’s been a tough couple of years for you, and I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it’s no secret that Maja’s condition is worsening day by day,” said the Doctor to Stella, who seemed to have been lost in thoughts with little Zoya next to her in the chair pulling her arms.

It’s been two years since the day Stella had rushed Maja into the hospital with blood all over shirt where she’d hoped the lingonberry sauce would rather be. The incident was etched in her memory, and she could remember it as clear as yesterday. Every time she reminisced that night, she felt her heart drop to the bottomless pits of hell. That night, the Doctor revealed to her that Maja had an unusual condition of Spontaneous Coronary Artery Dissection (SCAD), and at that time, she couldn’t understand what it was and only wanted Maja to be okay and alive. Later she understood that it’s a tear in the artery which causes blood clots leading to a heart attack which could lead to sudden death in some cases.

Despite successful treatment, the attack has happened to Maja more than once in the past couple of years. All the joy of seeing her recovered and back home disappeared as quickly as smoke in the air when she suffered from the same condition again in a couple of months.

“Even though SCAD doesn’t cause long term effects, it could lead to other issues as side-effects, like weakening of the heart muscles from the attacks. I’m sure you’ve been explained of this already, but I wanted to let you know that again,” said the Doctor who tried to get Stella’s focus back.

“What else can we do Doctor?” asked an eager but tired Stella.

“We’ve tried stents, bypass surgeries, and blood-thinning drugs along with other medication. We’ve been trying, but as you can see, it also depends on various other factors,” said the Doctor with a pause.

“Please don’t tell me that I’m going to lose her,” said Stella cutting him off.

“Ms. Stella, I’m extremely sorry to say this, but you should start considering the possibility,” said the Doctor, and that’s all Stella never wanted to hear again. She grabbed the hands of Zoya and stormed out of the room failing to understand him completely, or because she did.

She looked at a barely awake Maja in the hospital bed as her eyes started shedding tears automatically. She sat next to her along with Zoya and her hands were shivering as she couldn’t speak a word.

“Hey little one,” said Maja as she saw Zoya, who was a sight to the sore eyes, literally. Yet to know the cruelties of the world in her three-year-old paradise land, Zoya couldn’t understand why mommy can’t get up and play with her as she kept staring at her with restrained but beautiful eyes.

“So, Stella, how long have I got?” asked Maja playfully, with a heavy voice.

“Stop kidding, I’m not letting you quit that easy. You’re left with a long time to hear our bickering and nuisance,” said Stella.

“Look at you, lying through your teeth, although you’re the one who keeps saying we should be honest with each other all the time,” said Maja jokingly. “I’m not even allowed to lie for a prank.”

The Cause and The Res(v)olution

Alex never seemed to take rest. She spent day and night working on making the global regulation on artificial memory recall a reality.

“Alex, would you like some coffee?” asked her mother. Alex didn’t answer as she was so focused on writing a furious statement on her projected computer.

Her mother worried about her, although she’s motivated and wants to make the world a better place for all of us, she started to turn into her grandmother who was in Sweet Haven elderly living home, staring at the window with a blank face. But instead, Alex stared at computer screens all day or talking to people.

“Alex, you have to get some rest,” said her mother placing a hand on her shoulder.

Alex felt as if she was brought back into the real world. She took her glasses off for a moment and wiped her eyes.

“I’m sorry Mom. I know I’ve been working a lot lately, but we’ve almost won, mom, we’re almost near the finishing line. All the years that we’ve spent fighting, all the years that I’ve seen grandma suffer, it’s going to pay off, you can be sure of that,” said Alex.

“I know honey, I do believe in you. I fought for the same purpose all my life, to create awareness, to make people realize that living in the past with only your memories won’t let you create new ones. Soon, there won’t be any memories to make, and where will people end up living then? I’m glad that you believed in my mission and took the fight directly to the demons, but I’m worried that you might end up losing or hurting yourself in doing so,” said her mother in a concerned tone.

“No mom, I’m not losing myself, I’m rather finding who I am,” said Alex, reenforcing the belief that she had in the cause.

Her mother paused for a moment and with a nod, said, “Have you spoken to your grandmother lately?”

“No, but I’ve been in touch with Jenny. She told me that grandma’s condition is getting worse day by day. It is because of her that we’re fighting this battle. I don’t want anyone else ending up the same way that she did, ever again,” said Alex.

“Sleep, my little Alex. Tomorrow’s the big day,” said her mother as she kissed Alex’s forehead before leaving the room.

Alex woke up the next day as the bright rays of the sun hit her dark face. Having slept on the desk, she felt a growing pain on her neck. Her heart raced immediately after realizing the fact that she had to get ready for the assembly where they announced the decision. On the way to the hall, she met Dr. Anders again who gave her a deep look of disapproval and all Alex did was to reply with a smile.

“Greetings to everyone who has gathered here,” started the President of the UN. “We’ve had several discussions and voting sessions with Member States, their representatives, and experts in the past decades regarding this issue and we can all agree that these are stressful times for us with multiple global crisis looming over our heads including peak in population, world hunger, and global warming, to say the least. The reason why we’ve gathered here is to provide the address the catastrophic impact created by the overuse of Intelligent Artificial Memory Recall, or the IAMR technology. The complete report will be released later today, but I’m here to give you the short version that matters to most of us.

Although technology has raised our living standards and chances of survival, we should also acknowledge the harmful side of it, which usually doesn’t take the center stage in most advancements. One such incident was the invention of IAMR, which helped us in so many ways. We were able to use the technology to find out the cause of a crime and people involved, just by looking into the perpetrator’s memories and we were able to avert global crisis like man-made disasters and life-threatening terrorist attacks.

However, we can all agree that such a powerful technology needs regulation and control. We can’t make the same mistake as a society again like we did with nuclear technology a century ago or overlook and brand it as something simple enough, like the over usage of plastic or industrialization. We must take necessary measures for the welfare of the future generations, that otherwise will eventually lead to a disaster that we’ll collectively regret, and it’s the very thing that we are trying to avert.

We adopt resolution by consensus and not by vote. The UN along with the Member States have come to a decision of regulating the usage of IAMR and limit the usage only to allowed governmental bodies and establish stricter rules for the usage by the citizens of those countries. I’d like to take this opportunity to mention a few of the important clauses that we’ve drafted –

• IAMR can only be used by countries and their government officials who are approved.
• Every country must go through an approval process which will be carefully certified by CSTD officials along with the approval of the UN.
• Memories to be encrypted and stored only by governmental agencies and approved corporations who comply to the newly enforced rules.
• Installation of the memory transmitter into the human body should go through the same approval process and every registration will be uniquely identified and tracked.
• Citizens will be allowed to access their stored memories only once a year after they go through a similar approval process which will be overseen by respective regulatory authorities of their countries and with proper reasoning.

And the regulation will come into effect as early as end of the day today and we’ve been working with the corporations behind the scenes to facilitate this change and rules of adherence. I’m requesting cooperation from the media and the public and would like to thank the Member States and representatives for their immense support throughout the investigation.”

More than the joy of winning, Alex felt proud, proud of herself and her mother who stood by her and fought for this very moment all along. She knew she could make a change in the world when she believed in a cause, and she’s not going to stop there. There are many issues in the world that need addressing and she’ll strive to find and inspire more young revolutionaries in the future, and work together to make a better future, to eventually make humanity not only an intelligent but also a compassionate, peaceful, and an awoken species in the society.

The phone vibrated in her pocket as soon as she came out of the court hall, and she saw the name Zoya on the screen. She took the phone in the first ring, excited to hear her voice.

“Mom,” she said.

“Alex!” her mother exclaimed. Alex couldn’t speak, she suddenly felt at a loss for words. That was a special moment to her.

“You’ve done it my little Alex! We won! It’s all because of you,” exclaimed Zoya, as Alex could hear her mom through her tears.

“Mom, meet me at Sweet Haven,” said Alex, as she got into her car and drove to the only person that she wanted to see right now, her grandmother.

As soon as Alex reached the reception, she asked for her. “I’m here to visit Mrs. Bergen, please. I’m her granddaughter,”

“Ms. Stella Bergen?” asked the receptionist, and she saw Jenny walking towards Alex to greet her.

Alex went to her grandma’s room to see she was looking out of the window, still in her bed.

“She hasn’t eaten anything in the past three days. We’ve been trying to feed her, but she rejects anything that we give, so we had to put her on the IV. Her condition is worsening day by day and we’d suggest taking her to a hospital for medical care,” said Jenny as she stayed out and let Alex go inside without her.

“Grandma,” Alex called out, as the television in the room was playing the news on loud where the TV reported announced the new rules and regulations on the use of IAMR and what it means for other technological advancements in the current state and in the future.

Alex switched off the TV and to her surprise, her grandmother turned towards her. She raised her hands to touch Alex’s face.

“I need to see her,” said Stella.

“Grandma, I don’t understand,” said Alex, perplexed.

“I need to see her one last time,” said Stella. Alex understood what she meant although she didn’t want to. A tear dropped from her eyes involuntarily as she placed the memory recall device on to the side of Stella’s temple and touched to engage it, with a heavy heart.

The end of the beginning

Maja had asked to wear her favorite peach cocktail dress that day, while she was still in the hospital bed. She wanted Stella to comb her hair and she felt as if her tangled and frizzy hair was the reason why she felt sick. Meanwhile, the nurse took little Zoya for a quick walk outside.

“Aren’t you scared?” asked Stella.

“I am. I’m scared to death,” said Maja jokingly.

“What did I tell you about jokes?” asked Stella sternly.

“I know you hate them, but I love to see you annoyed,” said Maja with a smirk. “You know this was the dress that I wanted to wear for the party after we got married, and I also have a tiny version of it for Zoya.”

“You look beautiful in it,” said Stella. “One of the main reasons for how much I love you is that we are polar-opposites, to say the least. I bring the basic within you and you bring the bitch inside me.”

Maja struggled to laugh, and she couldn’t even lift her hands to punch Stella, which she playfully does so often.

“If you ask me if I have any regrets in life, it’ll be that day in the café. If I get one more chance to relive that moment, I’d have asked my sister to put the ring in the coffee instead of just the sugar cube,” said Maja. “Foolish me wasted so much time in life, all the time I could’ve spent with you and Zoya. I was looking for something that I wanted without knowing I had it in front of me all along.”

“Love, it doesn’t matter. Eventually you got there, now we have a beautiful life together, our beautiful daughter who gives so much happiness in our lives which I can’t wait to capture every moment of,” said Stella.

“Be careful what you wish for, Stella,” said Maja jokingly, as she started to gasp and fight for her breath again. She coughed up enough blood to make her peach-colored dress red.

Stella ran out of the room calling for help and a couple of nurses immediately ran towards her to check on Maja. The nurses tried to hold her into position as she suffered another seizure which lasted for a whole minute and all Stella could hear later was the flatline from the heart monitor.

Alex’s heart dropped for a second and she shouted for help as her grandmother stopped breathing.