Lily

“Not good, not good at all.” My Boss yelled at my paper work as I tried to ignore him as I customarily do.  As I set the rejected papers down at my desk I felt like I was about to faint, looking at my weary face my colleague lent a hand. “Do you even like this job?” he asked, without even thinking for a second I returned “But it’s the only one I’ve got.” He didn’t give up, “Why can’t you take a vacation? Clear things up with your mind?” “That thought has crossed my mind more often than my heart beats per minute”, “Then why don’t you?” he asked. I sat there with my eyes closed; head on the desk, the first thing I saw was a beach, its calm but excited waves playing touch and go with the shore, with a cold glass of margarita in my hand and my girlfriend right beside me enjoying the summer sun on her tanned self.

The pat on the back by my colleague woke me up. It was 7PM on the clock. I made up my mind to take a vacation, I wanted what I saw, I needed a vacation, and I needed it so badly. I went straight home, packed up my bags, I liked to travel light, so I packed some of the t-shirts and some of the shorts, no shirts whatsoever, not that I’d need them in a beach anyway. I took the night train since I’ve had a rough day I thought I could use some rest while traveling, so I did. The following morning, it was such a beautiful day, with the Goa skies all clear for the warming sun as I stepped down. I went looking for a motel that’s when a small man came up to me. “Aap ek hotel ke liye dekh rahe hei sir?” I stood there blinking as he spoke again “English?” “Yes please” I said, I thought it’ll be better for both of us. “Looking for hotel?” The boy asked. “Yes, I’m looking for a place to stay, just for a week.” “Come.” He said. For some reason, I thought he knew the place around, so I followed him.

He took me to this place, ‘Sleep Inn’, a decent name I thought. I took a room with a beach view; the room appeared as if as bear was living there before. I had to pay the maid some decent amount to get a special clean up. There is nothing money can’t buy in this country I felt, I’m not going philosophical. The little boy came up to my room with a coffee and newspaper; he sat beside me as I thanked him. Since I knew nobody except the little one, I tried to start a conversation with him “What’s your age boy?” I asked him. “Twenty” he said. That shocked me. He definitely didn’t look twenty; he looked more like the kid who is trying to get in to high school next year. He said his name was “Jack” as he was a fan of Titanic apparently; I asked him about the place, and if there are any places to visit except the beach which was pretty much what I came for. He started giving me the tour guide talks, talking about Churches, bars, and parks. Excited, I took a fresh shower and came down for a hot plate of baji-pao and a cold milkshake to start the day.

Something happened then which was such bliss even to think of it now. I saw a girl, out of the window, beauty like you’ve never seen before. She was riding this bicycle with flowers adorning the front basket, but I didn’t see them, I saw those little flowers hanging on her sunlit brown hair, she had a smile on her lips, the one that you can die for, she was smiling and waving at someone. That moment I lost myself completely, she conquered my thought filled mind. I pulled Jack by his collar, I enquired him who she was and what she does. Her name was Lily, just beautiful as the flower is. My legs started acting on their own; I went out to see her as she faded out of the window sight. She entered an apartment which was painted green. By what Jack told me, she worked at the flower shop, five blocks away, she loves the theater, she loves her mum, a friendly open minded girl.

I knew I had to talk to her, I knew I can never forgive myself if I don’t even try, hence I risked it all. The next day morning, she came that way, on the same bicycle, but today I crashed right on her intentionally. Her flowers were smashed on the road, she helped me get up. I apologized, she was upset that the shopkeeper will only blame her and so I insisted that I’ll pay for the damage, but she thought her boss will never believe her. So I asked her where her shop was. I followed her there, I took the blame and paid the money straight. I was positive that it’d make an impact on her, and eventually it did. She called up to me when I was just about to leave and she went, “You are new up here, are you a tourist?” not denying, “Yes, I’m John” I said introducing myself even if it wasn’t asked for. “I’m Lily, nice to meet you John” she held up her hand. “Not very nice I guess, considering I crashed into you on our first meet.” I joked. She laughed at it, no matter how bad it was. That’s when I gave in totally, her laugh made my heart surrender to her. I wanted to see her laugh forever.

“Where are you staying right now?” She asked. “Sleep Inn, few blocks away” I answered. “Oh, I heard it’s not that good a place to stay except the beach view.” I laughed, “But I can adjust. It’s just for a week or so.” “Alright, enjoy your stay” She said cutting off the conversation. I didn’t want it to end, not so soon. “Hey, I’m new here, just was wondering if you are free, you know, show me places?” I asked confidently, she took a moment to answer “Uh, absolutely. My shift will get over by six everyday”. I took that as a yes, “So, I’ll see you tonight then.” “Sure” was her reply with a smile.

I prepared myself fully for the night, my first date with her, if I can call it that. There was this new play in town at this oldest theater “Love at first sight”. Perfect, I thought as I got two tickets for that, way too costly for a local theater but totally worth it. I went to pick her up at 7pm, I got her some flowers, as I was waiting in the cab, there she came, in not so good dress but yet she was stunning. Her skin was flawless as I kissed her hand and invited her inside the cab. We reached the theater on time and the play started. I felt the play wasn’t as interesting to watch as the title was, I sat there looking at her and to my surprise she looked back at me. I gave her sly smile and asked her how the play was, “To be honest, it is as boring as watching Miley Cyrus giving a speech about women empowerment.” “Up top” I said, “That’s exactly what I thought.” So we left the theater still having one and a half hour of the play to go. We started talking as we walked down the road; it was hard to get a cab at that time so we decided to take a walk.

She was telling me about her life, how she lost her father when she was eight years old and how her mother had worked her way up to bring her up in life. She was working at the flower shop part time to raise some money so she could go to college but only she knew how tough it was to her and her family. Her mother works at a restaurant, as a waitress getting some decent pay enough for her and her daughter to make a living. So she had to give up other luxuries such as higher education. I never thought a girl of such joy would have such a hard background. There is heat even in extreme cold, I thought. I was so moved and disturbed by how her life was; I spent the night thinking how hard it must have been for her.

We went on a few dates after that night, we had many sweet moments. One day, she wanted me to meet her mother, so I went with her, to her home. Her mother was gracious, such a loving and caring woman. She told me all about her family and how it had been such a challenging life for a single mother in the country. “I have given my child what she needs to live, but it’s hard to swallow the fact that I can’t give her what she loves and what she wants.” That’s when she burst into tears. Lily went up to her mother and held her. That’s when I told her mother something, something that I never even given a thought about. “If you can accept, I can give her education, I can make her go to college, and I’d like to do this for her and for you.” I thought I can somehow convince them, I loved Lily, I felt like I can give anything to see her happy. “No.” her mother refused. “No Sir, she’s my child, I don’t want to give you any trouble in any sort, and we can make our own life.” I didn’t give up, “Aunty, it’s okay, I can lend her some money, it is for her education, and it’s really not a trouble for me.” But she didn’t give up either, “Look Mr. John, you are a tourist, I don’t want anybody to help us get up, we know how to lead our life, we had been doing that for years now, and I think it’d be good for all of us if you just leave.” I understood what they have gone through, so I got up, went up to her and wiped her tear filled eyes, and I told her “You are the most amazing girl I’ve ever seen” and I left the place.

I went up to my room, thought about it a lot of times before I took a decision to leave the place. I didn’t think of it again, I packed my bags, checked out, bid goodbye to Jack and I left Goa. But my heart never left the place; I kept on thinking of her, day and night. I have heard people say, time can heal everything, eventually it healed me, it took me years. After ten years, I was having this conversation with my wife about what kind of wallpaper we can have for the bedroom. “Lily might be a good choice” she said. That’s when it dawned upon me, struck me like a lightning. Lily, I thought, sitting down for a moment. I missed her for years; suddenly I wanted to see her, for one last time. I told my wife that I had an urgent client meeting in Goa the following morning, so I packed my bags and took a flight.

It was almost midnight when I reached Goa. To my surprise I remembered Sleep Inn, I called for a taxi but there was none at that time, so I took an auto-rickshaw. “First time Sir?” he asked me. “No, I’ve been here before” I replied. “Where do you want to go? I know many places sir, even at night you have many places to see.” I asked him to take me to the same motel instead. As my eyes were racing by the sides of the roads, it got stuck at one point. I saw someone, someone just like my Lily. I asked the rickshaw driver to stop, I got a good look, it was her, it was Lily, she was standing with a bunch of girls, and she definitely didn’t look the way how I remembered her. She had high heels, short skirts, a messy top and a horrible make up. Excited to see her, I asked the driver, “Can you please wait, I have to meet someone from there, two minutes.” And what he replied shocked me, “Looking for fun sir? You don’t have to go to them, give them two thousand rupees and they’ll come to you.” And he whistled.